


chef's special

by freewaffle



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-17
Updated: 2020-09-17
Packaged: 2021-03-07 20:00:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26513332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/freewaffle/pseuds/freewaffle
Summary: “From the bright orange shirt with the blue patch hastily sewn in, to the shabby sweatpants, to the challenging grin directed towards everyone in the room - it’s clear that Naruto doesn’t belong here. Good thing Sasuke has never given a fuck about propriety.”Sasuke and Naruto are rival chefs at a high end restaurant in Tokyo. They also sleep together.
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 27
Kudos: 290





	chef's special

Ryugin has the sort of pale, barren interior design that the wealthy love to call “minimalist”. Sasuke knows for a fact that this is actually just a product of Kakashi being too lazy to decorate, but regardless, it serves to intimidate the new applicants.

They shuffle around nervously, as if afraid their presence will taint their pristine surroundings. They shuffle around the new guy too, but with disdain rather than worry, as if he’s a particularly disgusting insect that found its way in, and can’t be taken out.

From the bright orange shirt with the blue patch hastily sewn in, to the shabby sweatpants, to the challenging grin directed towards everyone in the room - it’s clear that Naruto Uzumaki doesn’t belong here. Good thing Sasuke has never given a fuck about propriety.

“New applicant?” He appraises him, carelessly.

“The best chef you’ll ever have,” Naruto replies, grinning. He’s got a rough voice, like something torn stitched back together. He’s sprawled out on the waiting room couch, as if he couldn’t care less that every person in the room has their judgemental eyes trained on him. Sasuke doesn’t exactly buy the act.

“You know, Kakashi’s got a reputation as a porn obsessed slacker. And it’s a reputation well earned, for the most part.” Sasuke smirks. “But he doesn’t take this restaurant lightly. So if you’ve got the slightest inkling that you can’t take the pressure, you should head out.”

“Don’t worry, I can _take it_ alright.” Naruto keeps his eyes fixed on Sasuke, throws him a leering grin. Sasuke blinks.

Was he seriously flirting? People hitting on him hardly came as a surprise, considering his default bitchface was generally enough to get men and women alike hot and bothered. But it was one thing to be approached at a bar, and another to have a new applicant come on to him in the middle of a five star restaurant.

He doesn’t really have time to work it out before Sakura calls for the next applicant, and Naruto Uzumaki strolls into the room like he owns the place.

-

“The objective is to create a meal that I like, out of the ingredients provided.” Kakashi tells the applicants, smiling. “Simple enough, right?”

Everyone in the room knows that’s bullshit. Kakashi’s easy going manner belies his legendary skill as a chef. He can be a harsh critic when he needs to be.

Kakashi always told Sasuke that a chef’s personality can be gleaned from their cooking. He supposes this makes sense. Sakura Haruno’s cooking is traditional and hearty, Sai's is eclectic with a strong emphasis on style and presentation. Sasuke’s own cooking is challenging - rare foods for a discerning palate. Critically renowned, but hardly comforting.

Naruto’s cooking, it seems, consists of haphazardly throwing in whatever he can find.

While the other applicants carefully curate their meals, relying on precise measurements and detailed recipes, Naruto seems to choose his ingredients almost at random. Canned tuna, salmon roe, cream, pasta, an assortment of spices.

“Well. This is either gonna be miraculously impressive, or a complete disaster,” Kakashi says cheerfully.

“I would lean towards ‘complete disaster’,” Sai replies.

“Hey! Don’t count Naruto out just yet,” Sakura cuts in. She shares an apartment with Naruto, having apparently been his best friend for years. Sasuke strongly suspects this is the only reason Naruto has even been allowed through the front door.

They give them thirty minutes. The applicants bump into each other, clumsily arranging their meals on their plates before the timer goes off. Naruto shows no outward signs of nervousness, finishing off his meal with a dramatic flourish.

By all means, his ingredients shouldn't work together. By all means, the meal should look and taste like shit.

And yet...the presentation is immaculate. The salmon roe gleam delectably, decorating a dollop of cream on a mountain of buttery pasta. The tuna is cooked and shredded so that its flavor will be subtle, complementing rather than overpowering the delicate spices.

Kakashi takes a few bites of each meal. He takes his time, contemplating. All the applicants fidget except Naruto, who never wavers.

It’s only once Kakashi reaches his meal that he smiles.

“You’re not exactly by the book, are you?” He says, finishing off his meal.

“Not even a little,” Naruto announces proudly.

“Hm. Congratulations on being among the rare chefs who can make that work. It’s one thing to create a good meal out of fine ingredients and straightforward instructions. It’s another entirely to create something delicious and distinct out of whatever you find in your pantry.” He nods at Naruto, the barest smile on his face. “You’re hired.”

The other applicants alternate between outrage and disappointment. Sakura beams. Sai wears his customary deadpan expression. Sasuke...feels oddly intrigued.

Kakashi takes them aside after the defeated applicants leave.

“As you all know, these are my last few months as a working chef. Sakura, I also understand you will be attending medical school in the coming year.” Sasuke was privately glad that Sakura was out of the competition. She was really the only person on staff with any shot at one day owning the restaurant, besides him.

“I want to pass off this restaurant to someone worthy, someone who can be innovative and responsible. I’m going to pass it to one of you.”

Sasuke can feel from the way Naruto tenses beside him that he definitely wants this. Maybe even enough to get in his way.

“Do your best to impress me. And don’t expect it to be easy,” Kakashi says lightly. His eyes rove over the staff, the majority of which is an indistinct mass to Sasuke, good at doing what they're told to do and not much else. Except now, there’s this new guy. Who has a way of capturing his attention whether he likes it or not.

As Sasuke heads over to his car, ready to leave, Naruto darts over like a bullet. Too bright hair and eyes, a too big smile, occupying too much of Sasuke’s space.

“So much for cracking under the pressure, huh?” He leans over to speak to Sasuke, blocking him from closing the door.

“You were alright,” Sasuke tells him, just to be a dick. Naruto’s face scrunches up in anger.

“Oh, come on! Don’t act like I didn’t surprise everyone.”

“I think,” Sasuke drawls, “that everything you’ve done since you entered this restaurant - the way you walked, talked, flirted with me, the way you cook, right down to the way you’re refusing to let me leave until I acknowledge you, is an obvious cry for attention.”

Naruto blanches, truly infuriated now. “Well my ‘cry for attention’ is gonna win me this restaurant! And I’m not going anywhere, so you just have to deal with it!”

“Who says I want you to go anywhere?”

“Uh, you kinda implied it? Just now!”

“I think you’re obnoxious.” Sasuke replies, easily. “Doesn’t mean I’m not looking forward to working with someone who might actually provide a challenge.”

Naruto is speechless at this. Sasuke smirks and leaves him standing there, red faced, as he closes the car door.

-

It's only Naruto’s first week working there when the restaurant is confronted with a visit from Ino Yamanaka - spoiled heiress, instagram model, and scathing food critic with an absurd amount of followers.

Sakura has gone into full drill sergeant mode. “I have researched everything I can on this woman. In terms of food, she enjoys decadent meals. In terms of service, she likes to be flattered. So no weird social mishaps! That means you two cannot talk.” She glares at Sasuke and Sai.

“Don’t worry, I have been practicing for this. I have realized that the best way to approach a woman is to tell her the exact opposite of what I am thinking. Since Ino Yamanaka is clearly hideous, I will greet her with ‘hello, sexy’.” Sai seems incredibly pleased with himself. Sakura winces.

“Um...let’s go with ‘hey, beautiful' instead. Or just go with my suggestion and don’t talk.”

“That also works,” Sai replies pleasantly.

“So why do I need this lecture again?” Sasuke asks, bored. Sakura gives him a withering glare.

“Because you, unlike Sai, are aware of social conventions and choose to ignore them! So just...don’t speak to the critic!”

Sasuke rolls his eyes. Sakura was so dramatic. All because he had told the previous prime minister, Hiruzen Sarutobi, that he smelled bad one time when he rented out the restaurant for his birthday.

Naruto comes skidding through the door, mildly sweaty, shirt untucked. “Sorry, sorry, I know I’m late - “

“We live in the same apartment Naruto, how am I on time when you’re not?” Sakura snaps at him, fingers pressed to her temple. Naruto grins sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Sorry Sakura-chan, but Gamabunta jumped out of his tank and got lost in the apartment and I just had to find him before I got here, ya know - “

“Alright!” Sakura interrupts. “Whatever! Let’s get to work now.”

Sakura goes to take Ino’s order in a clear attempt at circumventing Sai from reaching her, and comes back incredibly frustrated.

“She told me to surprise her, and then winked! What am I supposed to do with that?”

“Let’s go with the wagyu steak,” Sasuke tells her. “It’s a classic high end meal. Not like she can complain about that.”

“She said she wants to be surprised!” Naruto says. “Wagyu steak - that’s so _boring_.”

“You spend a lot of time eating wagyu steak, loser?”

“What did you call me?”

“Okay!” Sakura comes between them. “Look, I just started anger management therapy and I really cannot be a mediator between you two, so please get your shit together. I have to check on the other customers.”

They decide to go with an embellished wagyu steak, but naturally can’t quite agree on how it should be embellished.

“Caramelized shallots and blue cheese are a perfectly adequate addition to wagyu steak. You’re over enthusiastic in your embellishments, and will overpower its richness.” Sasuke informs him, frustrated. Naruto is indignant.

“A red wine sauce on top of all that won’t overpower the natural fattiness of the meat, it’ll balance it out! Why don’t you stick to cooking your weird little pufferfish recipes, Sasuke, and I'll deal with Yamanaka - “

“Uh, guys?” Sakura pokes her head in, and speaks through gritted teeth. “Yamanaka wants her food now.”

Sasuke grimaces. Damnit. They haven’t even started.

“Fine, we’ll add the red wine sauce,” he tells Naruto, who grins smugly in victory.

They rush through the kitchen to prepare the meal, handing it over to Sakura once they’ve placed the final touches.

“You better not have fucked this up,” she growls at them, before rearranging her features into a strained smile and heading over to Ino.

Sasuke is tense as he prepares the other customer’s meals. He does care about Ryugin’s reputation - he plans to own it one day, after all.

Sakura returns an hour later, blushing for some inexplicable reason and clutching a small piece of paper in her hand. Her cheeks are almost as rosy as her hair.

“Okay, so. She said...it was the best meal she’s ever had.” Sasuke feels the tension leak out of him at her words.

“Alright!” Naruto exclaims. “That’s - wait, why are you blushing?”

“She got Yamanaka’s number. She handed it over, winked, and told her they should meet up later, which to me sounds like a euphemism for sexual intercourse.” Sai tells them. Sakura blushes deeper, and Naruto snickers.

“Awww, Sakura-chan, do you have a crush?”

“I just met her, dumbass,” Sakura bites out, but she’s clearly flustered.

Sasuke is about to leave later that night when Naruto stops him. He holds out a bottle of red wine.

“How about a drink?” Naruto’s cheeks are rounder than ever, Sasuke notes, when he smiles like this. “You know, to celebrate me being right and everything.”

“...Alright,” Sasuke says, smoothly. “But let’s not forget I suggested we go with wagyu steak in the first place.”

“Yeah, yeah. So are we drinking or not?” Naruto thrusts a wine glass at him, and Sasuke takes it.

He’s not sure why he stays at the restaurant late just to drink and talk with Naruto. He’s not sure why he drives him back to his apartment when he’s tipsy later either.

Or maybe he does know, and just doesn’t feel like dwelling on it.

-

His roommate Suigetsu picks him up one night, since his car had to be sent for repairs.

“Hey, Sasuke. You ready to go?” He walks into the kitchen lazily, his hair slightly damp from the rain outside. The restaurant has cleared out by then, with only Sasuke and Naruto remaining to clean up a mess that, according to Sakura, was entirely their fault.

“I would be, if someone hadn’t spilled sugar and chocolate all over the floor.” Sasuke responds, glancing at Naruto coolly.

“I wouldn’t have done it if someone just let me add some more into the cake batter!” Naruto waves the broom in his hand in anger.

“It already had more than enough. It was a tasteful, dark chocolate cake for a marriage anniversary. Not for a five year old’s birthday party.”

“Just because you have shitty taste doesn’t mean that couple wouldn’t enjoy a dessert that actually tastes like dessert!”

Sasuke feels the corner of his mouth quirk, involuntarily. It’s always oddly gratifying to have these petty bouts with Naruto. Suigetsu is watching them with a strange look in his face.

Sasuke finishes up a few minutes later, and Suigetsu practically explodes the second they enter the car.

“Alright, so what was that about?” He asks, a familiar, annoying glint in his eye.

“What, me arguing with a coworker over a cake recipe?” Sasuke keeps his voice detached. Suigetsu looks unimpressed.

“Dude. How long have we known each other? That look on your face was actually disgusting. You’ve got a thing for him.”

“He’s a moron,” Sasuke says dismissively.

“Yeah. And you've got a thing for him.”

Sasuke supposes he can’t actually deny it.

“Does it matter?” Sasuke asks as they drive through the city. “He’s a coworker.”

“As if Kakashi would give a shit,” Suigetsu scoffs. Sasuke thinks of Kakashi reading porn novels on the job, and privately agrees.

“He’s also in competition with me for the restaurant,” Sasuke points out. “That isn’t exactly compatible with dating.”

“Nah, but it is compatible with fucking.” Suigetsu grins.

Sasuke thinks this over. He needed this restaurant. He needed to find a way to provide for Itachi - both of their finances had taken a severe blow from his medical bills, and Sasuke didn’t want him to have to work while he was still recovering. He wanted Itachi to be able to rely on him. It’s not as though they had parents looking out for them.

And yet, despite his determination to take the restaurant at the expense of Naruto’s ambitions, he couldn’t help but be impressed with Naruto’s creativity and tenacity. He couldn’t help but enjoy his company, unusual and disorienting as it was.

Suigetsu smiles at him knowingly, and Sasuke thinks he may have a point after all.

-

Naruto is making a Thai pork omelette, thick and golden and crisp at the edges. He flips it perfectly, and directs his most annoying smile at Sasuke.

“Watch and learn, bastard!” He flips it again, just to show off.

“Your pork stuffing is falling out,” Sasuke tells him. Naruto panics, before realizing his omelette is perfectly contained and that Sasuke is far too amused.

“Dick,” he mutters. Sasuke turns his attention to his shallots, meant as a garnish for his silky French omelette, alongside dill and goat cheese. Naruto watches, disgruntled, as he cuts through the onions with unnatural speed. They compete to see who can chop faster, sometimes, ignoring Sakura admonishing them for being “unprofessional” and “nearly cutting off their own thumbs”.

Sakura isn’t the only one questioning their petty competition, either.

“Weren’t you gonna make a move?” Suigetsu asks him later that night, fingers greasy from their Chinese takeout. “How the fuck is this flirting?”

“It’s just easier,” Sasuke says, shrugging. It was also, unexpectedly, fun. “Besides, I like the face he makes when I chop faster than him.”

“Yeah, I know when I see a guy chop onions real fast, I just wanna beg him to fuck me,” Suigetsu replies, deadpan. “I’m trying to help you out, dude. And I’m helping myself out too! You are not fun to be around when you’re sexually frustrated.”

Sasuke is sexually frustrated. He can't deny that. Sometimes Naruto will do something so incredibly stupid, and Sasuke will be overcome with this bizarre attraction.

He runs into exactly this hurdle one day, after their lunch break. Naruto has bits of rice stuck to his cheek and is straining his tongue to lick them off, rather than simply wiping them off with his hand. Sasuke is uncomfortably turned on.

Sakura takes one look at his face and practically shudders. “Oh, gross.” She mutters.

“What?” Sasuke raises an eyebrow at her.

“I know that look, Sasuke. That ‘I’m having sex with you in my mind’ look. Please just make a move so I stop having to see it.”

“Is that what that is?” Sai asks. “I thought Sasuke was suffering from constipation.”

Sasuke decides that he will make a move, even if it’s just to get Suigetsu, Sakura, and Sai to shut up. He’s also seen Kakashi peering at them over his book, and doesn’t want to give him an opportunity to get in on this either.

“Sometimes it’s best to express your interest through actions, rather than words,” Sakura coaches him before their shift starts, one morning. “Like, for example, Ino bought me a car.”

“I obviously can’t buy him a car,” Sasuke says.

“Oh, I know. I just felt like pointing out that my rich, sexy girlfriend bought me a car.”

Despite the less than stellar execution, Sakura’s advice isn’t bad in and of itself. Sasuke didn’t typically need to seduce people - either they approached him, or he would casually ask if they wanted to fuck at whatever bar or party Suigetsu or Karin dragged him to, and the answer was basically always yes.

But he wants to put in effort with Naruto. He tries to show his interest through aiding him through their day to day tasks, but Naruto seems to be equipped with the unique ability to misinterpret everything he ever does.

“I made the cappuccino so you can focus on the rest of that customer’s breakfast,” he tells Naruto one morning. Naruto blinks in sleepy, disheveled confusion, and then abruptly scowls.

“Trying to one up me, huh?” He grabs the cappuccino mug. “It doesn’t even have a frog design on the foam! That’s my signature, ya know.”

Sasuke sighs. He does know.

He thinks it’s fairly hypocritical of Naruto to become irritable with his offers of help when he attempts to swoop in heroically and “fix” his meals multiple times per week, but he doesn’t feel like pointing that out.

He’s almost given up by the time Ryugin holds its annual Christmas party. Ino rents out a hotel for the party, as a favor to Sakura.

Sasuke takes Karin as his plus one, which is customary for them, because it’s easier to give the impression he’s taken than explain to various women that he’s gay. Karin did have a huge crush on him back in the day - Sakura had, too - but she’d grown out of it.

Suigetsu had questioned why she’d gotten over him once when she was particularly drunk, and she’d replied that she used to think Sasuke was intense in a sexy way, but it turned out he was actually just intense in a crazy way. Sasuke supposes that’s a fair enough assessment.

“Ooh, nice party,” Karin remarks as she steps inside. She’s traded in her usual thick hipster frames for contact lenses, and twisted her vivid hair into a neat chignon. She looks elegant and sophisticated, completely at odds with her ravenous examination of the buffet table.

“Wanna eat?” Sasuke asks her. Eating is sort of how he kills time at every single formal event he’s roped into.

“In a minute,” Karin replies, eyeing him salaciously. “Don’t look directly at him, it’ll ruin my plan, but _someone_ is watching you _very_ intensely.”

Sasuke, of course, decides to look directly at him.

Naruto is gripping his wine glass so tightly that Sasuke is surprised it hasn’t shattered. He wonders what possessed Naruto to grab wine anyway - he was really strictly a beer and fruity, sugary drink kind of guy. Either way, his eyes are hard, his posture is tense, and Sasuke has never been more satisfied.

Karin grabs his chin and turns his head to face her.

“I told you not to look,” she whispers, scathing.

“Why not?” Sasuke really wants to look. Naruto is - annoyingly attractive tonight, tousled blonde hair, the sleeves of his button down rolled up to reveal toned, tanned arms, and to Sasuke’s never ending amusement, he’s actually jealous.

“Because we are going to keep making him jealous.” Karin tells him smugly.

He quirks an eyebrow. “Or I could just tell him that I want to sleep with him, and you’re just a friend.”

“Why do you suck the fun out of everything? Just trust me, I know what I’m doing.”

“Based on what, your amazing luck with men?” Sasuke asks, unimpressed.

Karin pouts. “Oh, don't be an ass. Besides, are you actually gonna act like he won’t just wildly and stupidly misinterpret whatever you tell him?”

Well. That was definitely a possibility.

He lets Karin play-act dating him the rest of the night. He dutifully opens his mouth when she feeds him a chocolate covered strawberry, he stiffly wraps his arm around her when she nuzzles into his chest. Naruto looks like he’s on the brink of losing his mind.

Karin leaves her seat momentarily to refill her champagne glass, and Naruto promptly takes her place.

“Wow, Sasuke Uchiha actually got a date.” Naruto grins, stretching his arms out behind his head. “Really gives the rest of us hope, if even someone with your ugly mug can get a girl to like you.”

Sasuke just stares at him. “How stupid are you, actually?” He’s almost genuinely hoping for an explanation. Naruto just scowls.

“Hey, I’m just joking around! Everyone knows you’re a pretty boy - “

“Naruto.” Sasuke says, very patiently. “Not only did Ino rent out the hotel lobby, but also every room on the first floor. I’m going upstairs now, to room 102. Feel free to join me.”

He’s ready to stroll away, when Naruto paws at his arm, frantic. “Wait, wait!” His eyes are wide, round as saucers. “I am not gonna be a homewrecker! I didn't even know you were - what the fuck?”

“I’m gay, she's a friend, we were trying to make you jealous.”

“That’s…” Naruto looks like he’s been hit over the head with a frying pan. “That’s a dirty trick, you know that?”

“It worked, didn’t it?” Sasuke can’t help but smirk as color rises to Naruto’s cheeks.

“I...you really are a bastard.”

“So I’ve been told. You coming or not?”

“Fuck yeah, I am!”

-

“Wow these beds sure are soft,” Naruto pats the plush mattress, sitting down gingerly. “Almost wanna take a nap here.”

Sasuke, who is in the middle of unbuckling his belt, stares at him. Naruto gives him a profoundly asshole-ish grin.

“I'm teasing! Who’s stupid now?” Naruto snickers and Sasuke has the strangest urge to fuck him senseless.

He pins him roughly to the bed, hands clasped firmly around his wrists, heated kisses pressed onto his lips, his jaw, down the line of his neck.

“You’re - so - “ he pauses to catch a breath, resting his forehead on Naruto’s.

“I’m what?” Naruto asks, loftily.

“Obnoxious.” And Sasuke presses a knee up against his crotch, relishing in the sharp intake of breath, leaving another hard, bruising kiss on the delicate skin of his collarbone.

-

It’s funny, how easily flirting and sexual provocation fits into their usual routine of petty competition.

“Man, I think I dropped a spoon,” Naruto says despondently, making a show of bending down to pick it up in Sasuke’s line of sight.

Sasuke gets him back later by grabbing a popsicle on his lunch break, and thoroughly enjoys watching Naruto blush.

“Since when does Sasuke like popsicles so much?” He hears Sakura ask. Kakashi simply shakes his head, and steers her away.

They decide to fuck in Naruto’s apartment one night, since Sakura is visiting her parents for the weekend.

“Your room - “ Sasuke tells Naruto, in between frantic kisses, “is actually disgusting.”

“And yet you’re still hard,” Naruto replies, grabbing Sasuke’s crotch and making him moan.

They’re naked, Sasuke with his fingers knuckle deep in Naruto’s asshole and his other hand bunched up in Naruto’s hair, when they hear the click of an opening door.

“Naruto! My flight got canceled.” Sasuke’s blood runs cold at the sound of Sakura's voice, but Naruto doesn’t seem to care. “Guess he’s not home,” he hears Sakura say out loud to herself. He glares at Naruto,

“Tell me you locked the door,” he says flatly.

“Nope,” Naruto says cheerfully. “But I think the risk of getting caught is sort of hot. Come on, I’m so close too.”

He was close. Sasuke had already prepped him. He glances at the door, which is shut tightly, although unlocked. Sakura wouldn’t come barging into Naruto’s room if she thought he wasn't home, right?

Sasuke presses his fingers further into Naruto, making him gasp.“Fine. But since you didn’t lock the door,” he leans down to whisper in his ear, “you have to be very quiet.”

“Won’t be hard if you don’t get around to fucking me,” Naruto says, and the sarcastic grin is what does Sasuke in.

He finishes stretching him out, and enters him shallowly, teasing the edges of his hole. Naruto squirms in frustration, and Sasuke smirks before slamming into him roughly.

They are really fucking now, and Sasuke can feel his thoughts dissipating in the face of raw, visceral pleasure. That is, until he hears a horrible, plaintive shrieking.

“What the fuck,” he gasps out, still inside of Naruto.

“Slipknot. That American heavy metal band. Sakura has crappy taste in music, just keep fucking me,” Naruto says.

Sasuke is trying. He really is. But he isn't desensitized to Sakura’s horrible music the way Naruto is and holy shit did she need to play it that loudly -

He hears a phone number being dialed, and a crooning _hey baby._

“And she’s talking to Ino,” Naruto says, burying his face in the pillow. “Man, I can feel you getting soft. It’s fine, we’ll pick this up some other time.”

“I miss you so much, when are you getting back from Paris?” Sakura is saying. “I tried that jumbo vibrator you bought me, by the way.”

“Who listens to slipknot while having borderline phone sex with their girlfriend?” Naruto mutters.

“Sakura, apparently.” Sasuke answers, exhausted.

They look at each other, and it’s as if the absurdity of their situation hits them simultaneously. Naruto begins laughing, and Sasuke can’t help but laugh with him too.

“You, uh, have a great laugh.” Naruto says. He’s so painfully earnest and Sasuke’s heart feels so incredibly full -

And they’re still in competition.

Sasuke feels his smile fade as he remembers. The restaurant, his ambition, Itachi’s medical bills, their shit luck. The weight of his responsibilities, washing over him like a shock of cold water.

He needed the money. Fucking was one thing, but he couldn't get attached to the competition. No matter who the competition may be.

If Naruto notices the sudden shift in his demeanor, he doesn't comment on it.

-

The restaurant has been closed for the day, having been reserved for a private birthday celebration for one of Kakashi’s old friends.

“Yamato is a traditional guy,” Kakashi tells them. “For today’s menu, think comforting, home cooked meals. Don’t get too bold. Sasuke, this is not the day to prepare pufferfish, live octopus, or blood clams.”

Sasuke rolls his eyes. So he liked to cook food that had a high likelihood of causing death or disease if prepared with the slightest imperfection. It was a testament to his skill, frankly, that his meals had never killed anyone.

Sai, who grew up with little concept of home, tradition or comfort, prepares a duck pate for an appetizer, because Sakura told him to. Sakura herself prepares a number of desserts - tiramisu with an authentic zabaglione sauce made from scratch, creamy chocolate mousse in pretty glass cups, a mango-basil vacherin, artfully decorated and served.

It’s up to Sasuke and Naruto to prepare the main course. In line with their French theme, Naruto chooses to make a baked pasta dish inspired by French Onion soup, and Sasuke prepares a thick veal stew.

“The funny thing about cooking for rich people,” Naruto says, as he tosses his pasta, “is their idea of comfort is so different from mine.”

“I know what you mean. I would just have a fried egg over rice. It’s actually the meal I was hired for.” Sasuke replies. He didn’t mean to - he hates when conversations with his coworkers become even vaguely personal - but with Naruto he just can't help himself.

Naruto chuckles. “Fried egg over rice, really?”

“Yeah. I was working at this hole in the wall place. Kakashi came to eat after hours and my boss made me make him something because he was too important to ignore. I gave him a fried egg over rice out of spite, he said ‘not bad’, and actually offered me a job.” Sasuke shrugs. “No idea what goes through that man’s head.” He’s actually very grateful for it - without Ryugin, he wouldn't have been able to make so much as a dent in Itachi's medical bills. But he isn't about to tell Naruto that.

Naruto shakes his head. “He really is a weirdo. Though I guess it kind of makes sense. If you can make something so simple taste good, imagine what you could do with quality ingredients. Me, if I was making a comfort meal, I would just make instant ramen.”

“Instant? Not even with fresh ramen noodles?” Sasuke asks.

Naruto shrugs, smiling nostalgically. “Well. Yeah. Growing up with nothing, that was my go to meal. I would take cup ramen, this meal that everyone agrees is shitty and bad for you and I would just...work on it. Make it as good as I possibly could, with what I had. It was satisfying, ya know? I had this long juvie record, everyone said I was going nowhere, but here was one thing I could do right.” Naruto pauses, realizing how much he’s revealed. “Damn, that got personal huh?” He laughs nervously.

Sasuke doesn't know why he says it, doesn't know how Naruto manages to pull these things out of him. “I’d like to try your ramen some time.”

Naruto brightens instantly. “Really? Yeah! Come over and I’ll make you ramen, you won't regret it.”

Naruto is absurdly cheerful the rest of the day, and Sasuke feels his heart constricting. Because to Naruto, cooking was a way to pull himself out of the shithole he’d been born into. That’s what it was for Sasuke too. Did Naruto even notice their conflict of interest?

When they’d first met, Sasuke had thought they were nothing alike. Turns out, they actually have far too much in common.

-

Sasuke should be distancing himself at this point. He knows he should.

Instead, he decides to introduce Naruto to his friends.

“Naruto,” Suigetsu greets him, waving his hand casually. “So good to finally meet you. I was the first one to call the whole ‘Sasuke having a crush on you’ thing. Just so you know.”

“Oh, I always knew about that,” Naruto replies, haughtily.

“You did not,” Sasuke scoffs. “Anyway, this is Suigetsu. That’s Karin, and that’s Jugo.”

“We’ve met.” Karin smirks at Naruto. “I made you so jealous that Sasuke finally figured out you were interested, and he made a move. You're welcome, by the way.”

“Oh yeah, you were really good at that!” Naruto says. He’s astonishingly relaxed, considering he had been in a borderline murderous rage that entire night. “I was so mad. I really hated you! I hated you so much!” He laughs. If Karin was anyone else she may have been uncomfortable, but as it is, she’s just flattered that her skills as a fake girlfriend are being recognized.

“It’s very nice to finally meet you, Naruto.” Jugo tells him politely. Sasuke is close to being grateful that at least one of his friends is capable of small talk, when Jugo adds, “Sasuke once stared at a ramen shop for a full ten minutes, and when I questioned him, he merely said, “Naruto likes ramen”. You must be very special to him.”

“Jugo…” Sasuke mutters, entirely exasperated, watching Naruto’s face split into an amused grin as Karin and Suigetsu guffaw.

They decide to go for dinner and then drinks. They huddle around a tiny, creaking table at a bar, nursing blue kamikaze shots because Naruto likes his alcohol disgustingly sugary.

“Wow, you really know how to pick bars, Suigetsu.” Karin says, sloshing down another shot. “I can feel myself developing eight different diseases just sitting here.”

“Shut up Karin, we know you only wanted to go to the one down the street so you could drool over the bartender.”

“Well, duh!”

“Are they always like this?” Naruto wonders out loud, already a bit tipsy.

“More or less. Imagine how it was when we all lived together.” Jugo replies.

“I thought it was some bizarre sexual tension for a long time. Like in those awful movies Sakura watches,” Sasuke tells him. He’s tipsier than Naruto - frankly, he’s a bit of a lightweight, but he’s trying not to make that obvious.

“Dude, that’s what I thought about you and Karin. Half the reason I agreed to share an apartment with you two is because I thought it would be funny to cockblock,” Suigetsu says, downing a shot.

Karin turns to Naruto, conspiratorially. “If you're wondering how we handled living with all of this,” she gestures vaguely at the entire table, “we actually catalogued all of our most annoying quirks, made a pact to keep each other in check, and anyone who broke the rules had to buy the others drinks that weekend.”

“Oh, I bet I can guess Sasuke’s.” Naruto says, snickering. “Is it his man spreading?”

“I’m not gonna sit around with my legs crossed, Naruto,” Sasuke tells him.

“Okay, sure, but you don't have to sit like you’ve got a ten foot cock either.”

Sasuke glares and Karin and Suigetsu cackle. Jugo also appears to be hiding a smile.

“His quirk was actually that he kept bringing home stray cats,” Suigetsu explains. “But man, he really does manspread. Karin’s was the worst though, she’d get hair fucking everywhere.”

“I’m sorry my hair is thick, and I’m not gonna be prematurely balding like you, Suigetsu!”

“You did leave it everywhere. You single handedly clogged the shower drain multiple times.” Sasuke says. “But frankly, Jugo’s was worse.”

“Mine was not worse,” Jugo says, oddly huffy.

“It was. Your parrots shit everywhere.” Sasuke takes another shot. “You’d think they were paying rent.”

“Alright, let's just agree that Suigetsu’s was the worst. He had this hideous pair of 'lucky sneakers’ that would squeak every time he walked. So annoying.” Karin informs Naruto. Suigetsu just shrugs.

“Just cause they pissed you guys off doesn't mean they weren't lucky. But anyway,” he turns to Naruto, leering. “I wonder what Naruto’s little quirk would be.”

“Oh, I think I’m pretty much perfect.” He says, brightly. “You’d have to ask Sasuke about that!”

“Well?” Suigetsu pushes, turning to Sasuke instead.

Sasuke racks his brain. He really does. And he finds himself coming to the horrifying conclusion that there's nothing he truly finds annoying about Naruto - more concerningly, he finds himself attracted to behaviors that objectively are annoying.

“Naruto collects a lot of frog themed stationery.” Sasuke says. Suigetsu rolls his eyes. Karin coos happily.

“Awww, that's so cute. You can't even think of anything!”

“Well, what do you expect asking someone who is clearly lovesick?” Jugo says, drunkenly, and Sasuke’s heart stops before he realizes Naruto is on his sixth shot and too tipsy to really register what just occurred.

Naruto is laughing, chatting with his friends. His hair is gold spun in the low lighting of the bar. He’s making his way into his friends' hearts, as easily as he’d made his way into Sasuke's.

It’s starting to unnerve him how easily Naruto fits into his life. As if he was meant to be there all along.

-

Naruto wants to try fucking him, and Sasuke obliges.

“Don’t go overboard with lube,” he instructs. “I like just enough that it’s comfortable, not so much that I can barely feel anything.”

But his instruction comes too late, as Naruto accidentally squeezes half the bottle onto his asshole.

“Uh...oops?”

“Of course you would,” Sasuke says, exasperated. “Here, let me do it.”

He preps himself, smirks at Naruto’s transfixed expression.

“Like what you see?” He teases.

“Obviously,” Naruto replies. “Sasuke - I can take it from here, if that's alright.”

“Fine by me.”

Naruto preps him carefully, delicately, but enters him with wild abandon. Sasuke is almost taken aback.

“Feeling eager, are we?” He says, as Naruto thrusts into him roughly.

“Notice how I don't tease you for a billion years before fucking you, like you do with me. You know, cause I’m nice.”

“You knew what you were getting into with me.”

Naruto just grins. “Yeah, I think I did.”

He continues driving into him, and Sasuke watches the light brush of freckles across Naruto’s nose, feeling oddly content. Naruto leans down to kiss him, gentle and chaste, completely incongruent with the brutality of his fucking.

“You good?” Naruto asks. Sasuke just nods, a bit lost.

Plenty of men have wanted Sasuke. But their macho posturing and practiced charm did nothing for him. Naruto’s sweet, eager clumsiness does do something for him, apparently.

When they finish, Naruto flops over onto Sasuke, who promptly rolls him off.

“Ow!” Naruto yelps as he’s pushed off unceremoniously, but his indignation fades as he realizes Sasuke was just positioning him to spoon him from the back.

“You’re a bastard even in bed, you know that?” Naruto mutters.

“Hm. And you’re a loser.”

“I can’t believe this,” Naruto chuckles. “I fuck your brains out, and you’re still making fun of me.”

“No,” Sasuke’s voice is thick with sleep, he can feel his consciousness drifting. “I mean, that’s what I like about you.”

Naruto says something in response, but Sasuke is asleep before he can catch it.

-

It’s the morning after, and Sasuke is making a simple breakfast. Scrambled eggs with soy sauce and hoisin sauce mixed in for a distinct flavor, fried potatoes, steaming cups of cafe au lait, spiked with caramel.

Naruto yawns and stretches as he enters the room. Suigetsu is gone for the weekend, so they can take their time without his endless teasing.

“Hey, who’s that?” Naruto points to a family photo, positioned carefully next to a glass vase. “I didn't know you had a brother.”

“Oh, that’s Itachi.” Sasuke replies. For some reason, he feels reticent about the coming conversation. He’s fairly sure Naruto has put together that Sasuke is an orphan, but he doesn’t feel like dredging up details.

“What does he do?” Naruto asks, genuinely interested.

“Well, he dropped out of law school to open a jam making business.”

“Really? Is his jam any good?”

“I like it.” Sasuke actually hated it, but it seemed to make Itachi happy and he had a set of loyal customers, so he encouraged him.

“Good for him, then!” Naruto says, placing the photo down.

“He was sick for a long time,” Sasuke tells him, suddenly. He didn’t mean to but it's just been building - and Naruto has a way of exposing him, without even trying -

“Is he okay now?”

“...Yeah. But it was hard on our finances, and...I don’t want him to quit doing something he loves just to make money. He took care of me when we were kids with no parents around, and I want to provide for him.” Sasuke squares his shoulders, looks directly at Naruto, hoping his meaning has been communicated.

“...That’s why you’re so intent on the restaurant, huh?” Naruto says, and Sasuke nearly flinches at the pity in his voice.

“Stop. I didn’t tell you that as a guilt trip. I just wanted you to know I am taking this seriously. Very seriously.” Sasuke turns back to their breakfast, arranging it neatly across two plates. “That’s all.”

Naruto doesn’t reply, and Sasuke doesn’t understand the discomfort surging inside of him.

-

It’s the day Kakashi will announce who inherits the restaurant.

Sasuke ensures his cooking is in top form that day. He’s serving quail legs, roasted to a crisp, golden brown, with tamarind glaze and fig chutney. For dessert, he keeps it classic with a Black Forest cake. He takes a peak over at Naruto’s meal as he carves delicate designs out of frosting - Naruto is serving risotto lobster, with confit tomatoes and coral tuile. For dessert, he’s gone for mango mousse.

Naruto's meal is refreshing, unique, and colorful. It brings to mind luxurious dinners on a patio in late summer, when the world is bursting with life around you. Sasuke’s brings to mind cold weather, small gatherings, decadent meals accompanied with fine sake or wine. He’s satisfied with his work, but he can’t help but appreciate Naruto’s effort.

Naruto’s nose is scrunched in concentration as he sprinkles bits of pistachio onto his mango mousse, and Sasuke’s heart aches. He can’t just take Naruto’s dream away from him. Can he?

He decides to meet with Kakashi prior to the announcement.

“Kakashi,” he grits out.

“Sasuke,” he responds, pleasantly.

“I want to talk to you about the competition,” he begins, stiffly. “About Naruto. I don’t know what you’ve decided, but just in case I’ve won, I wanted to say…” he swallows. What did he want to say? Could he really just abandon something that could help Itachi? “I wanted to ensure that Naruto will be taken care of and….given a pay raise. Or something. Otherwise I don’t want the job.”

Kakashi is silent for a moment, before saying, “What makes you think you got the job?”

Sasuke is - disappointed and jealous and relieved simultaneously. “I didn't. Well. I see. I’ll be going then.” He’s about to turn on his heel when Kakashi stops him.

“I was joking, Sasuke,” he says, lightly. “It’s funny, Naruto was in here an hour ago trying to negotiate the same thing. Well, not quite. He was actually saying he’ll drop out and let you have the position.”

“ _What_?”

“Yes, I told him you would react this way. You don’t like pity.” Kakashi shrugs. “But he was adamant. You’re both wrong though, about who won.”

Sasuke blinks. “So...neither of us?” Who else could have taken the restaurant? Sakura wasn't in the running, Sai wasn't ambitious enough, most of the staff was talented but hardly on his or Naruto’s level.

Kakashi sighs, slow and exhausted. “Both of you. You’re co-owners. Is it that hard to piece together?”

It takes a moment for Sasuke to gather his thoughts.

“It’s just that, people who are together tend to pool their finances anyway, don’t they? I didn’t think it would make a difference.”

Sasuke, to his horror, feels his face grow hot. “We haven’t even moved in together yet!”

“Yet,” Kakashi repeats, and Sasuke’s flushes deeply.

He’s too dumbfounded to speak, so Kakashi speaks for him.

“I know about both your situations, Sasuke. It was also very obvious how you feel about him. I wasn’t going to put a strain on your relationship.”

“But...why? Aren’t you worried about the restaurant?” Sasuke sputters.

“I am sure you’ll both do an excellent job at handling it. Something good just happened to you Sasuke. Learn to accept it.”

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Only that you have trouble placing your trust in other people. And I understand why. But just as many people have disappointed you, there are also myriad people who will never let you down. You have to believe that they exist, too.” Kakashi places his hand on his shoulder and squeezes, the closest thing to an affectionate gesture that's ever existed between them.

And then he’s gone, leaving Sasuke to contemplate whatever the hell just happened.

-

Ryugin can’t exactly qualify as minimalist anymore, since Naruto took over decorating. Maximalist may be the more accurate term - the restaurant is transformed, a bright cacophony of lights and color. Sasuke loves it. It feels less like a building you toil away for hours inside of, and more like a second home.

“Sasuke,” Sai pokes his head into the kitchen. “Your brother has arrived. Would you like us to prepare anything special?”

“I’ll talk to him first,” Sasuke replies. And then he adds, reluctantly, “thanks.”

“Your restaurant is very…colorful,” Itachi tells him, as Sasuke approaches his table. “I never imagined you’d work in a place like this.”

“No one is more surprised than me,” Sasuke replies, dryly. “You know what you want?”

“Hm...I think I will try the chef’s special,” Itachi says, folding his menu. “What is the special, anyway?”

“I have no idea,” Sasuke says, although maybe he can guess. He takes the order over to Naruto.

“So you’ve got a special now, huh?” He asks, waving the menu in front of him. Naruto gives him his favorite smile, the one that’s almost too wide for his face, straining his cheeks.

“You gotta try it too, Sasuke! Remember, you promised.” And he darts away, stirring ramen noodles into a pot, and Sasuke understands.

It’s a simple meal. Tonkotsu ramen, with its white, cloudy broth and speckles of ginger. The pork is succulent and fatty, the noodles and eggs sit cleanly atop of the soup, with the occasional glint of green onions.

“This is remarkable,” Itachi says, taking a sip. Sasuke takes one too, and it warms him inside and out.

“So whaddya think?” Naruto asks him, eager as ever. Sasuke smiles at him - a real, genuine smile.

“Thank you,” he says. “It really is delicious."

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote the majority of this while waiting for my uber eats order to arrive today, and you can probably tell. believe it or not, the disgusting sounding pasta naruto makes at the beginning is a real thing, part of the whole fusion pasta trend.
> 
> another unbelievable but surprisingly true thing: that joke i wrote in about suigetsu wanting to cockblock sasuke and karin because he thought they had sexual tension is actually canon. like, it's a real thing he says, obviously phrased in a more shonen friendly way. team hawk is such a hilarious concept
> 
> anyway, lmk what you think!


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